The perfect choice

By on July 3, 2011

After years of dating, you finally proposed to your girlfriend and she happily accepted. You are both excited and looking forward to the wedding planning in the months ahead. One of the first decisions you will make as the groom is who will serve as your best man. There are a number of people who could fulfill the role; you just have to decide who would make the best fit.

If you have several close family members and friends, you may find it difficult to select a best man. Make a list of candidates, keeping in mind that your best man does not have to be a man or a family member. Your sister Rita or best friend Katie might make a perfectly good best woman.

Before you begin narrowing your list, you must consider the duties your best man will have to perform. The responsibilities of the best man vary from wedding to wedding. Traditionally, they include:
• Hosting the bachelor party
• Picking up and returning all tuxedos
• Helping transport guests
• Getting the groom where he needs to go on the big day
• Assisting the groomsmen on the big day and keeping them on track
• Bringing the rings to the ceremony
• Witnessing the marriage license
• Paying and tipping service providers as needed
• Toasting the bride and groom at the reception
• Driving the newlyweds to the airport after the wedding if needed

Depending upon your schedule, you may have the best man do more or less for your wedding. If you have a long list of duties, you will want to select someone who is dependable and has the time to get everything done.

In order to narrow your list of potential candidates, consider their qualifications in relation to the duties you would like them to perform. Be realistic in your assessment. Your younger brother may be very dependable, but with school and work, he may be too busy to take on the role of best man, especially if it involves several duties. Your older, more-established brother might make a better choice. On the other hand, if all you are looking for is someone to host the bachelor party and stand up with you on your big day, then your younger brother might make a good choice.

Pay attention to the distance factor. If your brothers live in the Pacific Northwest and the wedding is in Miami, they might be too far away to be a good best man. Choosing a close friend who lives nearby and has easy access to everything might be better, especially if you want them to take an active role in the wedding planning.

Whoever tops your list, make sure they want to serve as your best man. For one reason or another, some people simply prefer being a wedding guest rather an attendant. Keep that in mind and make sure you find out what the frontrunners think before you make your final decision. Should you be unable to select just one person, don’t hesitate to divide the duties among two or three people. Rather than one best man and two groomsmen, you could have three best men.

Selecting a best man takes time and effort. Be prepared to do the work, or you could end up being disappointed, and always have a backup choice. You never know when illness or some other unforeseen event might come up and take precedence over your wedding.

by Tresa Erickson, MultiAd